Apparently You’re Not Supposed to Mow the Grass Right After It Rains

direction every time.”

And suddenly you’re the person standing in the yard giving somebody a lecture about grass.

I used to think those people were being overly particular.

Now I’m realizing they probably just learned all of this the hard way.

They probably had the mower clog.

They probably tore up a lawn.

They probably cut wet grass once and spent the afternoon scraping a giant layer of green sludge out from underneath the mower.

At some point, you stop experimenting.

You just know.

Meanwhile, I have apparently been operating